The L-word

Here i am, sitting at my room. Checking on my phone, waiting for a message. From whom? A guy that I've broke his heart a few months ago? Yes indeed..
Yes and yes we're texting again, I know what everyone's thinking and they called me stupid of course. Ha! 

These few days, I've been thinking a lot..

Is this what i really want?
Is he the one that i love? For real?

Did i really want him back?

After everything I've done, did i deserve love?

Some people say that, it's not love until it makes you stupid and foolish.

ps : my friends would kill me right now, if they know the truth haha!

                                                          S.

About feeling

You often feel something, but express something else.
You mean something, and say something else.
The feeling that you've ever had is still doesn't make sense.
Well, I'm not someone who generally likes those things.

Here's what it feels like when it happens:
You feel warm in your cheeks, your stomach sort of like exploded, then your heart starts to race.
It's something of a habit of mine and many people.

For the example: 
When you've ever date someone, and crush on him/her at the first sight, so this is the beginning. At the beginning of the crush, you can't stop thinking about this person. And your only goal is: to be near them as much as possible and when you are, you've never been happier at that time. Your mind, your world, your sense is about them. Sometimes you need to worry about this feeling. It takes you up and down like a roller coaster. But you still get fun on that.

Don't need to hurry. Simple like that. Slow down in the beginning, take some time to get to know the person before you go all in.

And the last, you don't have to take every crush seriously. Not all of the crush is sweet, there is a terrible crush too. Ha ha I don't mean it. But yes, people stop loving people all the time. And you need to accept that. You have to learned that, and sometimes you try to stopped you own heart and back to your real sense.

Last but not least, I can pretty much guarantee, when you success control your emotions, your feelings, your senses, your heart, and your mind, you can enjoy your love trip with no worries at all.




all of them is what I've learned in the past, and now I am really back to my sense.

R.

bicara cinta

kau dan aku saling pandang malu-malu diantara bangku-bangku berlengan nyaman di sebuah kedai kopi,
atau ketika mata kita saling bertemu diantara kerumunan manusia yang memenuhi sebuah bis tua.
di lain waktu, kita akan mulai saling bicara, sepatah dua patah kata yang berujung sebuah cerita.
mungkin sekedar pasar malam atau hanya warung tenda pinggir jalan, tapi tak masalah asal kita berdua.

kata orang, itu cinta..

namun tolong jelaskan apa namanya?
malam-malam sendu tanpa ada lagi cerita
mendengar rintik hujan saja membuat mu ikut menitik
atau ketika kau ingin menangis tersedu-sedu, meraung penuh rindu tanpa ada yang tahu

masih kah itu cinta yang sama?

atau kita hanya sekedar tertipu oleh cinta
perasaan menggebu-gebu yang salah kau artikan
kebetulan-kebetulan menyenangkan yang berakhir kenangan

ini bukan tentang cinta yang salah, mungkin ini memang bukan dia..

Z.